COMMUNITY MAKER: BETHANY LUTZ

BY MADDIE STEELE

“Can you just photoshop me to look about 20 pounds lighter?”

It is inevitable that this question, or one focused on another “blemish” in the body, is asked of me at least once during a photo shoot. Sometimes I’m asked to make them look a few years younger, get rid of the double chin, cut out the scar. You name the flaw, people want me to take it out in the photo. I’ve been asked to edit out all kinds of things people hate about themselves, as if they think the goal of a photo is
to make them look like someone
they’re not.

I always laugh awkwardly at this question, usually saying something along the lines of “no, you’re so beautiful just the way you are” or “oh, there’s no need for that.” But inwardly I’m often asking the same question of myself. I struggle not to mentally cut away pieces of my body when I stand in front of a mirror. It’s a universal struggle for most women, yet a struggle most feel alone in, and we settle for the idea that we don’t deserve to feel beautiful in a piece of clothing.

Bethany Lutz, owner of The Mother Thifter, spent most of her life feeling trapped by the same clothing and the feeling of being un-human, undeserving of beauty. Getting dressed each day was not a joyful ordeal filled with excitement; it was simply a routine, a mandatory part of her day. The pandemic of 2020 was transformational for most people, whether for good or for bad. Thankfully for Bethany, her life was flipped upside down and the heart of her business was born.

As a Jackson native, Bethany moved away and never thought she’d return, until she had two young children and chose to move back home where her family would be close by. That was in 2008, and her family has called Jackson home ever since. She lived a busy life, as most women do, of holding a million tasks every day and moving from one place to next. Life came to a rapid halt as the pandemic caused Bethany to be stuck in her house unsure of what to do with her time or how she wanted to make an income to provide for her family.

She had the energy and space to hope and dream like she never had before.

Her love for thrifting and helping women in the fashion world all began with a $100 Stitch Fix gift card, an online clothing store that customizes pieces of clothing for each person who places an order. When she received her package in the mail filled with pieces that someone else had chosen for her, it caused her brain to spin a little. Stitch Fix gave her these $100 gift cards to hand out to other friends, and Bethany convinced 15 people to sign up in a matter of 24 hours, even though the company was only going to reward her for six people signing up.

Bethany had a realization — she was really good at convincing people to buy something.

And so began the process of cleaning out every item of clothing she had, selling it on Facebook, and using the profits to build an entire new wardrobe for herself.

“It was life changing because I had never been considered. In my adult life I had never been anything but a function, I had never taken the time or money to even think about what I wanted,” Bethany said. “Rebuilding my own wardrobe during the pandemic was just one of the ways I became a different person.”

The transformation didn't just end with her wardrobe, but she started the simple act of washing her face and choosing skincare that was right for her. She began to touch her face, a sheer evidence that she was human, that she was a tender person that deserved to feel beautiful and cared for.

“I realized I was a person, I’m a human being, I did not know that. So I just kinda tucked that away and kept doing life,” Bethany explained.

After she cleaned out her closet and rebuilt the wardrobe, she looked around her house and realized there were more items she could sell. So, the home decor followed. She sold everything on Facebook and used the money to re-furnish her home. And so the cycle continued as she took the grocery money to Goodwill one week and resold the clothes to make a profit. As she repeated this process over and over, she began to see a business unfold before her eyes.

As her friends and community continued to purchase Bethany’s clothes and see how good she was at piecing together outfits, they started asking her to clean out their wardrobes and rebuild them. She would arrive at their house and help them try on and get rid of old clothes or pieces that didn't serve them well. But it didn't stop with the closet cleanout. She then would bring in new pieces that were chosen specifically for that individual woman. Pieces that were hand picked because Bethany could see them looking beautiful wearing the clothes. Pieces that fit their bodies exactly how they were, not how they used to be or hoped they would be.

This process of the closet clean out brought out all the emotions tied to these items. Feelings of shame, hurt, hope, joy, and ultimately the stories attached were the reason why these clothes were kept for so long. Bethany takes customers from a place of discouragement and shame felt over their old clothes that don’t fit, to clothing them in pieces that have intent, beauty, and honor behind them.

“That is transformational, to be in the presence of people who are seeing themselves for maybe the first time, and seeing themselves with kind eyes,” Bethany said.

Most of the time, women are the ones doing the preparation in all areas of life, so Bethany’s heart is for women to have someone prepare something for them in this one corner of their lives. Getting dressed in the morning should be easy, not a moment filled with lies and shame. It should be a part of our day we look forward to, not a time we dread as we fall asleep at night.

“Bethany is consistently making magic with, to some, little to nothing. It is so much more than putting on clothes when you enter the store, though,” Alice Hardin said when speaking about her friend. “Bethany creates a special environment for everyone there, almost effortlessly showing hospitality, listening to peoples’ life stories, sharing bits and pieces of her own story, encouraging flattering clothing and also just making others laugh.”

As I sit in Bethany’s storefront in a beautifully thrifted chair across from her, I’m surrounded by all these clothes that have had previous owners but are ready to be worn by women dressing with intent.

Bethany looked at me and said, “After knowing you for only a few minutes, I know exactly what you would want to wear and what would look good on you.”

“How do you do that?” I ask, referring to her ability to know what a woman will like and what looks good for her body from just knowing her for a few minutes.

“I think it’s because I’ve seen so many women standing in their closets, and I’ve seen them wrestling with themselves and what looks good on them,” she said profoundly.

“There’s a force in the world that really wants women busy and overwhelmed and tired. And wants women to say ‘as soon as I finish this set of tasks I’ll focus on this other thing.’ It’s a lie, it’s a trick. I know all these women who say ‘I’m gonna get back into the gym so I can wear my old clothes, so I don’t need new clothes.’ And it’s always later,” Bethany said. “But by the time later comes you realize that life doesn’t stop and the time never came. No one is going to take care of you, you are going to have to take care of you.”

This is Bethany’s heart. To care for women in a way they’ve never cared for themselves. Whether you walk into The Mother Thrifter with $25 or $1000, she wants you to feel prepared for and thought of. Everything has been chosen with care, it has been vetted for you and it has been infused with the intention of the place.

“I like beautiful things and being surrounded by beautiful things,” Bethany concluded. “I love making people feel worthy and connected to beautiful things and I like to help people see themselves as deserving of beauty as a baseline before they even wake up.”

MADDIE STEELE is a writer and photographer who recently graduated from Union with a degree in journalism. She works in marketing at Leaders Credit Union and runs her photography business on the side. She is passionate about telling real and authentic stories from behind the camera or on the page. In her spare time, she loves hosting people, traveling, and baking cakes.

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